It’s time for another landing page critique, and today I’m taking a look at landing pages that are dedicated to Online Bingo. Following last week’s appeal for landing page examples, we have received several Bingo landing pages to be reviewed here at Clickthroo.
Each landing page will be looked at from the point of view of the user in order to determine whether the page delivers a clean, successful landing, or a bad one. Areas that require attention will be highlighted and suggestions for improvements will be made along the way.
1. This headline needs to be made bigger and a little clearer
First of all, this headline is much too small. It’s one of the most important elements on the page (second only to the CTA Button) and is overshadowed by accompanied graphics and surplus copy. This is what grabs the user’s attention – so make it BIG.
Secondly, the message isn’t clear enough. What exactly am I signing up to, and what has the ‘Free £15′ got to do with anything?
How about this: “Join Now and You’ll Get £15 Free Bingo Play”.
This headline makes it much clearer that this is an online Bingo service and also includes the value point of the promotion – the free £15 worth of Bingo play.
2. Why is this image relevant to the service?
At a guess, I’d say these piles of coins signify the £15 worth of free Bingo play being offered. But that’s all it is; a guess. There’s no clear indication from the main image that this is even a Bingo site at all.
I would definitely suggest changing this image altogether. Use something more literal, that includes actual Bingo-related icons and imagery, and then put those images into a context that resonates with the user – such as a woman clutching a bingo card in one hand and the promotional ‘Free £15′ in the other.
3. Needs social proof/customer testimonial to make it friendlier
This is a promotion for online Bingo, not a white paper report. Cold stats and figures aren’t customer friendly, and even though they can help promote an offer, they can also hinder if they look too overwhelming or confusing.
I strongly recommend including some form of social proof here. A simple quote from a satisfied member would be best. This would help get your promotional stats and figures across in a clearer, understandable manner, whilst at the same time establishing trust.
4. This CTA Button looks lost and needs better copy
The call-to-action button is a similar shade to a lot of the background colors and as result it doesn’t stand out. Just changing this to a different color is going to improve the effectiveness of this page.
Also the button text is weak. Give me some reason to fill out the form and click that button.
Instead of asking users to ‘register’ at the top of the form, try this: “Sign up now to receive your free £15 Bingo play”.
This call-to-action speaks more directly to me, and gives a good reason to sign up.
Then change the button text to something more motivational, such as “Join Now” or “Click here to Join”.
This landing page is in serious need of a tune-up. It comes across as lazy and too vague. Some user engagement would be nice, and a clearer definition of the offer being promoted would be even better. Until those issues are fixed, I’ve got no option but to call this a Crash Landing.
William Hill Bingo
1. Unmistakable but uninspired
This is what I like to see; clear, unmistakable and straight to the point. There’s absolutely no misinterpreting the purpose of the landing page with this image.
I suppose you could say there’s some creativity lacking here, maybe an image of a person actually playing Bingo might help connect the user with the promotion a bit more, but there’s no overstating the importance of clarity.
I’d suggest testing this image alongside a landing page variant with a more emotive hero shot. Like I said, using an image of a person, creating a narrative and putting the promotion into a context that resonates with the user might be more effective. It’s definitely one to try out.
2. This headline doesn’t grab me
Despite it’s fractured syntax, the headline is pretty much straight to point and does indeed include the value point of the offer being promoted.
My main issue here is with the way it has been written: “£40 Free New Player Bonus” is, like the hero shot, unmistakable but rather uninspired. Yes, I understand that new players receive a free £40 bonus (permitting terms apply) but this headline doesn’t exactly grab my attention or make me want to join. It’s all too sterile.
How about something like this: “Join Now and You’ll Get £40 Free Bingo Play”.
This headline is equally straight to the point, it includes the value point, and at the same time addresses the user more directly.
3. Clean breakdown of information
Essentially a follow-up of the initial headline, these arrow points go into further detail about the nature of the promotion the same way a subheader might do. It’s a clean, concise breakdown of important information, delivered in such a way as to ensure that the process of signing up will be quick and simple. Thereby encouraging me to go ahead and join whilst telling me how – very effective.
This is really great-looking landing page. It’s definitely got the fundamentals in place; it’s direct, clear and concise, but it fails to engage the user on a personal level (which is also important). This could easily be fixed with the suggestions made, and perhaps the inclusion of some sort of testimonial or customer feedback. But despite all that, I can’t fault the straight forwardness of this landing page. This is a Clean Landing.
1. This headline doesn’t tell me much
What is this headline trying to tell me? It took me a while before I was able to glean what the promotion was, or if the landing page was even relevant. The opening header needs to be more coherent in order to get the message across clearly.
How about something along the lines of: “Win £888 in Your Free Bingo Game”.
I would then follow it up with a subheader, extending on the one they’ve already used and replace it with: “Join For Free, No Deposit”.
This tackles the issue of coherency, as well as relevance. From this headline/subheader combination I know exactly what this landing page is about, and what the promotion is.
2. This image has plenty of feeling but it isn’t very clear
I really like this image, it represents the target customer perfect and has plenty of feeling, certainly enough to motivate a registration. But I can’t decide whether or not it’s clear enough. There’s no explicit indication of this being an online Bingo service, only a vague suggestion. In other words, I’ve haven’t SEEN anything that immediately tells me what the service or the promotion is all about.
I would strongly suggest testing this image against a variation with clearer meaning: perhaps include some more obvious Bingo iconography (such as Bingo balls, Bingo cards, etc).
There’s a lot of character on this landing page and it does a wonderful job of representing the target demographic, but this sacrifices clarity and meaning. The offer being promoted isn’t obvious enough and that is a big problem. I’m going to have to declare this is Crash Landing.
Next Week’s Clean Landing or Crash Landing
Next week we will be critiquing landing pages in the ‘Personal Injury Compensation‘ sector so we welcome any example landing page examples for review. Please send the URL of your landing page examples to email@example.com.
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